When I started off this year with the understanding that God has charted my road for me, little did I know that as we are coming to the end of this year, I would read that He charted it after He searched it out. It was not just a path, it was a journey that took me to places where I met with Him, felt safe, took risks and understood life and my purpose in it.
Still a few more days to go before He gives me another theme for next year, but included in this path He saw me wondering off too, a bit of rebellion here and there as well – He just simply knows me.
There is not a word that I have shared that He does not know already before I have shared it. He not only has walked ahead of me, but at the same time He walks behind me. I felt a bit like someone with a split personality from time to time because I would talk one way today and another way tomorrow but still be the same person with a relationship with the same God and yet with a totally different perspective.
Really, where can I go from God’s Spirit? How is it that I can ever imagine being away from His presence or the look of His eye? He will lead me always, His right hand will be extended to me too. I do not think that I will be spared from spiritual warfare of the darkest kind, but even those darkest nights will not hide God from me. Whether there is darkness or light, it does not matter – they are both alike to God.
He loves me because He made me. I thank Him because my life, from the moment I was created in my mother’s womb was lovingly planned. I am not crazy necessarily with my larger than life ears, but I do know they were given to me in love. My soul knows this really well.
He has made His precious thoughts toward me very well-known. Maybe one day I will count them all but I am afraid I might fall asleep before that happens.
So, today, as in all my days before I set out on the road that God has charted for me, I still ask Him to search me, try me, know me and see if there is something inside me He wants me to release into His hands so that He can lead me along the way without all the baggage.