Since the first of January I had decided that I would fast at least one meal a day and at times two, and on the occasion the entire day.
I have fasted before and each time these were days that heighten my worship and prayer life, made me feel special and drew my thoughts closer to God.
This year, my fasting had to do with traveling on the road that God had charted for me and so I have sought the character of a man who even has the right to expect such a feat.
The revelation of my sins and my disobedience and the multiple idols in my life are suffocating. I actually had to tone it down a bit because it was getting too much. I am sure that if I continue without taking a breather I would become stick and bones like King David experienced on many occasions.
It is very hard not to feel sorry for myself.
My longings for God are still the same, but I feel like I’m burnt out.
What I do, God, is wait for You. I wait and pray. I’m ready to tell my story of failure, I’m no longer smug in my sin. I am at the point I could use some wide-open space in my life.